The ins and outs of being a wedding guest!

After the ceremony; I was there with my son and opted for lavender colors for a summer wedding.

The wedding season is more than half done or at least the bulk of it is done, and while I love weddings–the romance and the special feeling one gets when seeing the bride walks down the isle, or the splendor of flowers and pretty place settings, and luxurious stationary paper…it’s actually kind of nice that the season is almost over. Weddings can be expensive and stressful, filled with obligations, awkward etiquette dilemnas, and seeing distant relatives that one only sees well, at weddings and funerals.

I was anticipating one event of the summer for me…My little sister’s wedding that was announced since the spring and last weekend was when she finally tied the knot with her boyfriend of many years… it was a small intimate event, simple and fun. And as a wedding guest, I didn’t have to do any intense bridesmaids duties, but as a guest there are still many rules to be observe to be a great guest. And to have a comfortable time there myself as a guest. Here are some notes I’ve made about attending weddings:

Ways to be a great wedding guest:

  1. Let the bride get her way: I think that brides, with all the stress of getting hitched and planning a wedding, they get a bit crazy and it rubs off in weird ways, on the bridal party and guests. The best thing to do is unless it is something really important, I just let her have it her way.
  2. Look good, but not too good: Let’s be honest, the day is the bride’s day, not the guests’; wearing that red hot number or, a revealing bodycon dress is not the place to go. I rather go for innocence and friendship with pretty, simple dresses that are wedding appropriate and will not outdo the bride, but still have a sense of fashion.
  3. Wear neutral make-up. I really like expressing myself with make-up, but bold trendy make-up is just too much of a statement. As a wedding guest, I feel more comfortable blending in, and not standing out.
  4. Make polite cheerful conversation even if it’s hard: I find it very unnatural to be happy all the time and it’s always when I’m feeling a bit down that someone who would care about that approaches me. All it takes is one dour expression, and you’ll end up looking too stern and risk looking like a pouty party pooper.
  5. Fashion don’ts for girls: No black or white dresses, no mini skirts, nothing overly formal that would outdo the bridal dress…no bra straps or bralettes visible, cover up shoulders during ceremony, reception can bear shoulders. I also don’t thoughtlessly wear just any old dress. I want to show some effort was involved and that I care how I look to the bride, groom and other guests.
  6. I like to look like I’m having fun, even if I am not. Accept drinks when offered, and participate in toasts, dancing, and anything else that may be happening. And remember to congratulate the bride and groom! Be a gracious guest at all times!
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Hair coloring obsessions and other thoughts on my birthday…

So recently I’ve been coloring my hair like crazy…check out my post about soap capping. It’s been a goal of mine now to have ashy, cool toned hair colour, because well, as a dark haired asian girl, that is near impossible. Black is my natural color, and that’s as cool toned as my hair wants to be. But as I age and become more pale, black hair is actually too harsh for my skin tone (plus the occassional white that hair creeps in). But when I try to lighten even just a few shades, my hair screams a bright red/orange tone, even harsher than black hair for my complexion. I actually had to go through a lot of chemical processes to get it to be the cool toned light brown I have now and I’m ashamed to say it, since I kind of fried my hair with a chemical soup to get it…But now I think I got it, and really don’t care if it’s not exactly the colour I want…me needs to let go.

So this is just part of the chemical soup I subjected my hair to trying to make it ashy: developer, bleach lightener, permanent colors…additives…etc.

Today is my birthday, I’m another year older, and I’m really thinking today about how unimportant hair color is…all the cosmetic procedures, chemicals and efforts us girls put into altering our natural appearance doesn’t add up to much. When the truth is, nobody cares about the color of my hair…I recently reviewed some lipstick on here and to think I about it, I doubt anyone really cares about my lip color either. It’s fun, but that’s it…The truth is, cosmetics and fashion is a past time I enjoy…but not ultimately what people care about in me. My dad’s obsession for example, is seeing me eat more, eat healthily and sleep.¬† Ha ha. Really that’s all he cares about. Most people just want others to be healthy and happy. So I know that taking care of oneself’s mind and body is ultimately the most important thing to do…

Time to say sorry to my body and hair for everything I put it through for the sake of my vanities.Whether it is soap capping twice in one night to lighten it, or putting in harsh dyes and toners to perfect my hair color, or not eating bagels since they make me bloat…I have start seeing as to how I am pretty mean to my body…and it’s time to say sorry. How do I say sorry to my body? Some ideas I have are:

  • Don’t wear make-up on my off days, I just moisturize your skin and drink lots of tea
  • Do have that pastry/cookie/candy I’ve been thinking of
  • sleep in that extra two hours…I will never run out of chores/work that I gotta do, but I know I can always do it later
  • give my hair a hot oil conditioning treatment and not worry about what it will do its color
  • Feed your mind: Do something that has NOTHING to do with being gorgeous. (no fashion/make up stuff) Write an article or read a book about something cerebral. Create something that will bring value to your health, or learn something about the world your never knew.
  • Don’t look at trends and covet them on social media. Look at yourself and what you want to accomplish and achieve…

Remember the important things in life…and be happy. That’s what I’ve been thinking about on my birthday today. Nothing is worth doing if it doesn’t make us healthy and happy. It’s really easy to get caught up in getting the latest fashions and make-up trends, and cosmetic procedures…but knowing when to stop is key.

 

 

I don’t usually write make-up reviews for cosmetic giants, but…

Maybelline doesn’t need my help to sell it’s make-ups. It’s as ubiquitous as all the other make-up giants; that kill the environment, use chemicals and test on animals…Maybelline is no exception. But since this is a make-up journal, I feel inclined to report about how I recently discovered the crazy over performing lipstick that is the Maybelline Super Stay Matte Ink Lipstick line. It’s a semi-new release (within the last year) that has gotten me in a state of fandom over long wear make-ups for my lips…(since that’s really the only place on the face that needs it…since we eat and drink, every hour of the day)

The two best colors from the line, as mentioned by a lot a reviews: Lover (mauve), and Pioneer (classic red)

I come from a philosophy of simple is better, less is more and basically I feel natural always trumps chemicals. That’s why I have a line of gentle handmade cosmetics and perfumes called Dream E¬†available for all. But because I work in the fashion industry as well, I know how important a well painted lip can be and how much it can pull together a fashion look from head to toe. So here I am being hypocritical about my own philosophies by liking super-stay lipsticks; since they probably have more in common with car paint enamel than the traditional wax based lipstick…what to do…

The reason I feel I have this contradiction is because ignorance is bliss. If I think about the chemical gloop that are in super-stay lip color, I would probably cringe…but I am slightly comforted by the fact that once they set, they don’t go anywhere. They become more like clothes that one wears and then takes off at night. The problem I’ve always had with traditional lipsticks were that they were movable, oily and gross, getting on food, coffee cups and clothes. I could feel them on my lips, they felt greasy, slimy. Not to mention they are made with chemical/metal colorants that could make their way into my body eventually. Too gross. But the great thing about a color stay lipstick is that it doesn’t budge, and because of that, I am assuming the chance of it getting into my belly is unlikely? (cross my fingers)

Ok now that I’ve explained my contradiction, what were the general downsides of wearing color stay lipsticks? Flat, unfashionable choice of colors, uneven wear throughout the day, 2 step application of some formulas, drying feel on the lips…the thing with the Super Stay Matte Inks is though that they don’t feel dry on, the wear is even throughout the day with NO retouching at all necessary…and they come in highly pigmented, velvety colors that you virtually paint on once carefully, and forget about it. It is that comfortable and light, that I forget I’m wearing it until I walk past a mirror and see my high fashion lips!¬† Just like a great eye make-up that you put on once and don’t have to worry about reapplying throughout the day, you can live the busy life you have, while having a high maintenance lip look that nobody knows you didn’t work at!

Here is the mauve color (“Lover”) on my lips. In this photo, it looks a bit muted, but in real life it’s actually deeply pigmented… almost plumy…
And here is the classic red color (“Pioneer”) on my lips. I really like the intense color and matte velvet finish…

The two colors I own from this line is a gorgeous mauve pink called “Lover”, (that started me on this epiphany of how to wear lip color from now on!) and a rich, classic red called “Pioneer” that screams fashion! I was doing a make-up look that was sans lipstick for a few years now, since I couldn’t deal with the gross feel and maintenance required of tradition lipsticks, but with this new long wear formula from Maybelline, I am a fan of colored lips once again! From reading other reviews online, the two colors I have demo-ed in this post are the two best and most popular colors from the Matte Inks line. Which one is your fave?